Stupid things people say to vegans


I’ve been vegan for two years, but I’ve been immersed in the vegan world for a long time through my work. I’m lucky enough that the majority of people in my life don’t stay stupid things to me about being vegan, but working in marketing for a vegan company means that I get to see the way that people treat vegans a lot. In case you’ve never looked at the comments on a vegan post on Facebook, enjoy these examples:

  • Plants have feelings too

They don’t though. Like, seriously, they don’t. They grow, they are alive, but they don’t feel pain, and as such, we vegans can eat them. Because if we didn’t, we’d die.

  • Having a dog makes you happy, so that’s animal exploitation in the same way eating a cow is

As Phoebe in Friends learnt, there are very few truly selfless good deeds. Of course, choosing to share your home with a companion animal brings you joy, and if they were truly wild, you could be accused of exploiting them for your own gain/enjoyment. But pets are domesticated animals (through the intervention of humans, of course), and so they can’t live in the wild. Do I advocate dog breeding? No, because inevitably there’s a female dog out there that is being used as a breeding machine. But I don’t think that having a pet is animal exploitation. Though I would always advocate adopting an animal that is looking for its forever home over buying the perfect, Instagrammable puppy if you can manage it.

  • Mmm, bacon

This is the one that you see a whole lot on social media, any time you post about veganism. Guess what, suckers? We’ve got bacon too, and no pigs have died in the making of it! You can buy vegan bacon in most supermarkets nowadays; try THIS if you want to cut out the pig in your diet but still crave the taste of bacon.

  • If you’re vegan, why do you want food that tastes of meat?

Because a lot of us still like the taste and texture of meat, but we hate the idea that little baby animals have been wrenched away from their mums so that we can enjoy a roast dinner.

  • You shouldn’t be allowed to call it milk/a burger/a sausage/vegan ‘chicken’ if it’s not the real thing

Honestly, I don’t care what it’s called, whether it’s milk, mylk, or m*lk. It really doesn’t bother me, as long as it hasn’t come from an animal’s udder. But the hypocrisy is real, y’all. Come back to me when you are feeding your kids minced-cow-flesh-shaped-into-patties instead of ‘beef burgers’.

  • Bringing up kids on a vegan diet is unsafe

I don’t have kids, so I’m not feeding them anything. But if I was a parent, my children would obviously be vegan. Almost every parent I know tries to get their children to eat more vegetables. Almost every vegan parent I know has no problem with this, because everything they eat is made of plants. Vegans are so used to hearing about all the nutrients that they are missing out on that mostly we are pretty clued up on what we need to eat to make sure we’re not deficient in anything. I’m sure that for parents, that goes for their kids too.

It’s odd, sometimes, being a vegan. Choosing not to eat meat or animal products really seems to rile people up in a way that you wouldn’t believe possible. I guess the answer here is don’t read the comments – a pretty good general rule of life.

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  • Reply Chrissie

    I could come up with good answers to all of these dum questions except yummm bacon, UNTIL I tried Quorn smokey sausages and OMG it made the whole stupid bacon argument a moot point. 😉 BTW can you recommend a great melty and tasty vegan cheese for toasties?

    April 16, 2020 at 9:03 pm
    • Reply Jane

      Have you tried the Applewood vegan cheese? It’s a smoked cheese, so it depends on if you like that flavour, but it melts like regular cheese, and I really love the flavour! I think it’s exclusive to Asda – they also do their own brand of vegan cheese that they use on their pizzas, and that’s pretty good too. Hope that helps!

      April 16, 2020 at 10:27 pm
  • Reply Susie -

    Ahh yes I’ve had all these stupid things said to me! I love being asked what I would eat if I was stuck on a desert island with a pig – honestly I’d probably die if I wasn’t rescued and then the pig would eat me 🙂

    May 6, 2020 at 1:54 pm
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